One to feature that was continuously stated when sharing services of one’s most useful upcoming partnership is actually an effective “husband” who was financially secure. Ladies indicated additional viewpoints about what they sensed it meant to become financially secure. Certain lady talked about their companion because sole supplier on the loved ones while others described its spouse given that leading to the family money. Over and over again, girls stated that it need lovers which you certainly will “provide for you.” Women just weren’t particular concerning particular business or community you to definitely the top spouse might have, but were precise that the employment must provide “sufficient to shell out their expenses otherwise what they need in daily life.” Various other fellow member explained the most useful mate an individual who “…are unable to owe people money and you’re playing with my personal currency to invest her or him right back; no you have to be financially stable, have a very good house, a good work, a decent job…” Female plus chatted about the lover becoming independent and not in need of so you’re able to use them to own something. That it price grabs these thoughts: “I might want them to be successful, eg a person who may be able to feel separate, version of. They might get up on their one or two ft easily free online one night stand hook up sites in ghana wasn’t around.”
Objective built
From inside the a lot more to help you being financially stable, lady need the next partner who was “goal-centered.” Although they did not bring certain all about exactly what this type of wants should be, female decided one the most useful partner do “must be motivated to do something employing existence. They can not take a seat on your butt for the remainder of the lives and manage nothing. That is an enormous problem.” Another woman revealed it this way, “Easily possess living together therefore do not, you have got to go, … I simply want someone who has their lifetime together, who knows what they need, what they’re performing … you just need to get direct best; you’ll want a beneficial head-on the shoulders.” As several other analogy, one to woman explained a future mate during these terminology: “Your gotta features possible, your gotta currently have one thing taking place having your self because if We have one thing going on with me, I am not likely to correspond with someone that’s starting something shorter. So that you have getting something choosing on your own you to definitely will in reality create myself now have a reason to chat to you personally.”
Dialogue
Females given thoughtful and you may expressive comments regarding their dating opinions. Whenever because of the opportunity to mention their dreams and you can wishes to possess most recent and future relationship, females offered confident depictions regarding relationship and you may relationship which have an appropriate spouse. That it depiction is somewhat weighed against far established look and this too frequently depicts Ebony females because vulnerable into exposure engagement and you may unhealthy practices (Sullivan, Childs, & O’Connell, 2010). Information gleaned from these interviews in ways dispels the notion that all Dark colored female don’t realize healthy relationship characteristics (Raiford et al., 2007). Ladies contained in this sample explained its best matchmaking using terminology one to portray self-confident attitudes of adolescent current and you will upcoming relationship.
Greatest Relationships Matchmaking into the Twelfth grade
Parallels and you may distinctions have been one another obvious regarding Dark colored girls’ narratives about an ideal relationship matchmaking, now as well as in the near future. Numerous templates emerged using their dysfunction of one’s best dating while in the high-school: (1) temporariness out-of highschool dating, (2) having a partner just who common comparable education and you may career arrangements, and you will (3) requirement for family unit members for the distinguishing a perfect matchmaking. Other templates emerged in their description of the better coming relationship: (1) interest in marriage, (2) economic stability, and you can (3) requires situated. Also, in the characterization of your own top matchmaking while in the senior high school along with tomorrow, girl talked about a desire for ‘most useful friend’ features such as respect, trust, and you will trustworthiness. It’s guaranteeing to listen to one to teenage Dark colored women lay worthy of in these features and definitely search him or her within close relationship.